Why the Therapist Might Have More “Street Cred” Than You — But You’re Still the Expert
If you’ve ever said something to your anxious or struggling child a hundred times, only to hear them come home from therapy and say, “My therapist said…” as if it’s the first time they’ve heard it—you're not alone.
It’s a real thing. And it can be incredibly frustrating.
So, let’s break it down:
Yes, a therapist might have more “street cred” with your kid, especially at first.
And yes, you are still the expert on your child. Both of those things are true. And when you work together, it can be a powerful combination.
Why Do Therapists Get So Much Credit?
Therapists bring a few things to the table that give them an edge in the credibility department—especially with kids and teens:
1. We’re Not Their Parent
As therapists, we don’t have to enforce screen time, broccoli, or bedtime. We’re not the ones telling them to brush their teeth or clean their room. That separation allows us to stay neutral and feel “safe” in a different way.
2. We’re Trained to Stay Calm When Things Get Big
When your child spirals into anxiety, anger, or avoidance, you’re emotionally connected (because you love them). Therapists are connected too—but in a professional, more detached way. That calm can make kids more open to listening and working with a therapist can help parents with the calm part, too.
4. Therapy Feels Like Their Space
Even when therapy is hard, it often feels empowering. It’s their hour. Their space. That autonomy gives kids ownership—and they’re more likely to absorb the message when it feels like their idea.
Why You’re Still the Expert (Yes, Still!)
You know your child better than anyone. You see the full picture, not just the 50-minute highlight reel. You’ve been there through every meltdown, milestone, and late-night worry.
Your instincts, your history with your child, your values—all of that is essential information for your child’s therapist. We need your voice in the room (even if you're not literally sitting there).
You know what motivates your child. What triggers them. What’s worked before, and what hasn't. That lived-in, day-to-day expertise is something therapy can’t replicate.
The Real Magic Happens When We Work Together
The therapist might plant the seed, but it’s you—the parent—who helps it grow.
Here’s how we can share the load:
Therapist builds trust and teaches tools
Parent provides practice, structure, and encouragement
Together, we give kids a consistent message from two safe adults
When we collaborate, kids start to see that therapy is a team effort, and they’ve got support on all sides.
A Note to Parents Feeling Underappreciated
If your child only seems to “listen” to the therapist right now, try not to remember that it’s a kids job to learn to figure things out on their own. They still need so much guidance but if they are not taking everything at face value, that is a good sign!
It doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong. It doesn’t mean they don’t hear you—it just means they’re in a phase where outside voices feel easier to accept.
You’ve been their safe base all along.
You’re still the expert.
And with a little help, you’ll both keep growing together.
